Rabu, 23 Juli 2014

Speak Up, Speak Loud

Got this from my following friend on instagram. It wasn't nice tho, its deep.

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"What doesn't kill you make you wish it did"
I know it sounds too much but it is. I never thought I could've ever felt in love this deep. Sometimes it's better to be alone, no one can hurt you that way. I had to accept the fact that I'm tired of this bullshit, the whole thing about relationship were way too complicated for me. I would've just ended it if I could, but I didn't though. I never believe in karma, but god damn thats real. I've rejected people and hurts their feeling more than they ever deserve. I know that's rude but it was just too hard to give others people the opportunity to taking care of the feelings I had.

But I was wrong and too late to realize.

When I start giving my lover all of the attention I got and every single feelings I had they turn their back from me.

One of my friends asked me why I keep holding on like this? This relationship ware going too far and doesn't make any sense at all. I can't answer that simple question. But one thing I don't know why... I'm scared. Scared to face the truth that if I stop, the one 'I hold on to' are going fine without me, on the other side I couldn't ever not to think about them every second I've thru.

But it just sad knowing that you did everything you can and gave every single effort you have, but they're just walking away with it. Sometimes I lay on my bed at night, and think about things I wish I could say. And sometimes the fear or failing haunt me. The pain was just too real I can tell. But somehow, the paint just makes me miss them even more. Stupid right? but it is what the truly happened. Broken heart again, another lessons learned. But as long as I can stand the pain there's no thing I couldn't do. Like I've said before, I could just give up the fight but one thing for sure is that I don't give up easily, I fight for what I want. It takes a lot for me to actually give up on something or someone. I can't just throw all the hard work and time I put into it. I can't just give up just because times are hard, especially if that thing or person mean so much to me. I keep fighting for what I want until I can't fight it anymore..and until giving up is the only option left.
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Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.. Sad but true this guy have a great heart I guess. I couldn't say anything, it's just too deep. This is almost same with mine, but sadly this guy feel more painful haha maybe. Great, that was great to hear someone loving someone else unconditionally. I wish for you all, and I wish for my self too. There is no time for regretting cause pain make you learn better. Cause no pain no gain. And the important thing to remember is 'We are not holdin on someone/something, we are fight for it'
So..... You always knew what to do. You are the fighter so only you who have a choice.